Our Lady of the Bones

From Wikipedia:

"Left Hand Path is a term used in occultism for one kind of spiritual path. It is the opposite of the Right Hand Path, which is what most people think of when they think of religion or spirituality.
The use of this term in occultism came from a term used in Hindu Tantra, Vama marga in Sanskrit. This ancient form of tantra used the breaking of rules (taboos) as part of the practice. Rules about diet and sex were broken on purpose. For example, rules against eating meat and drinking alcohol might be broken. Such a practice might require eating meat and drinking alcohol while having sex in a graveyard or cremation ground.
People who follow the Left Hand Path in the West are not interested in giving up pleasure or the world in order to be spiritual. They are not interested in worshiping God or following rules made up by others. They seek to gain power and freedom by breaking through taboos, fears and restrictions.
Many people link this term with Satanism and black magic, but they are not the same. The Left Hand Path is sometimes described as amoral."

I'm not one to go on about morality, taboos, or anything like that. The restrictions of the "official" organizations, whatever they are, tend to sound more self-serving than anything, either falling into the religious spin, or the "secret club" game, but mostly, its about "follow the leader." Its not a game I play well. I can listen to what's being said, it may make sense at the time, and I may fall for it... briefly. Unfortunately for groupies, my basic makeup makes me pretty self-reliant, so the onboard critical lens flips back on and the bullshit scalpel comes in and starts removing the unnecessary fodder, which in many cases, strips most of the message. In the end, all that is left is technique, or at least, those that work in my personal repertory.

Whats the point of all this? Well, if you've read any of the previous posts, you'll notice a pretty obvious path of questioning, one of conscious transition, from whatever state I was in to whatever will be next. I have been doing all sorts of things, not necessarily constantly, but transitional periods are rarely consistent; think of how it was to be a teenager and you'll quickly understand what I mean.

One of the recurring themes of the period has been the purge. All kinds of things get collected over the years, some of them casually, some with intent, but they collect. Eventually, they collect dust. That dust can be both the common layers that lay of the objects in the house as they lie forgotten, but there's plenty of dust that accumulates elsewhere, layers of crap that weights down the mind and spirit, all kinds of clutter that clumps down thought patterns and prevent you from moving forward, like all the stuff that piles up in your house.

While I've been doing some purges some time back, collection has renewed and I've fallen back into the bad patterns.

But.

Recent turns of events, when taken in a certain sight, tells me that the transition continues and some paths get revealed to be dead ends. Not long ago, I opened some communication channels with a fine lady with apparent knowledge and demonstrated experience with the more creative and dynamic paths of evolution. Then the goals I had been vaguely pursuing in my physical work have been identified and the routine has been set to put me on the path of achieving them. This week, as I was leaving the gym, I had a simple choice: turn right go wandering to the commercial path where money gets easily blown away on knicknacs, or do I turn left, grab some fish and go home? I turned left. Then the next day, I cleared up some space and did some home workout. Today, I decided to finally drop by the pawnshop and see if that little gizmo I had spotted a while back was still there, and since the price was quite agreeable, I picked it up.

And its a great little piece of work.

All this is, in my mind, an indication that I am going the right way. It lit up some areas I had been setting aside where more cleanup is required. It allowed me to see how those ares could be dealt with. I can feel myself moving forward again. Sure, inertia is still the bastard that slows me down, but the running I've been doing shows me that I can move forward at very nice speed, and with endurance, so its all about kicking myself in the butt.

There are different ways of getting motivated. There are others that can motivate you, consciously or not. But the basic fact is, you have to have your mind open to those possibilities. And its amazing what nearly two months stuck lying down can do to get you motivated. That, and the musty smell of the grave.