Saturday, January 23, 2010


You keep hearing about traumatic events as being life changing, or circumstances that make you rethink things or, in some cases, will make you deeply aware of the glory of life and the inevitability of death. Right. I have gone through a summer of suck, the kind where you wake up in a hospital with no idea how you got there, where exactly you are, what time is it and so forth. The type that leave you with a time gap in your internal clock of a few weeks. The sort of events that has doctors flipping coins on whether you'll live or die.That kind.

Well, call me full of shit, but I did not get the magical lightning strike that reminds me that I'm alive.Because seriously, I wake up every morning and, boom, there it is, I'm alive. Just like that. Nothing particularly game changing, at least on a religious or spiritual basis. Nope. No deity sent me burning bushes or golden cows or anything, I just woke up and there I was.

What did take place is a more casual realization that I has shit to do and I had wasted a lot of time pondering needlessly and doing little to get projects done and on the road to accomplishment. One of the effects of that realization has been to proceed to a purge of stuff. You know, the stuff that has been taking space in your dwelling, the kind of clean up that takes place when you're about to move to a new home, or spring cleaning. Well, spring cleaning has never meant all that much to me, and given that I had all that time on my hands and that I had a drive to do it, I did it now, right away, and screw the conventions. Why wait? Why waste yet more time, time waste accumulating yet more stuff, which will just drag you back and down even more by the time "spring cleaning time" comes, so why waste it?

So the first thing that went was clothes. Too much needless apparels gathered and piled in corners, waiting for that "special occasion" that will never come. I had lost weight during my hospital stay, so clearing out the stuff that no longer fit made sense. It was a perfect opportunity to clear off all that cloth that had been hoarded off, for when I'll be clubbing and all that; time to take stock and take out the old. What is the likeliness that I'll be wearing the same duds I did ten years ago?

Once that was done, it came time to deal with furniture. A bundled payment made that a little easier, and a lot harder to claim "not now", cause something else might be needed... bullshit; I've been wanting goddamn bookshelves for a good long while, in they go. Couches a problem? Couches gone, problem solved. Need some couches? Build them. Need a computer desk? Buy one. Done. Next.

Of course, there is always a next of some sort. But the kind of purge I am pursuing involves not only getting rid of accumulated trash, physical and other, but getting rid of long neglected projects. The point of this purge is to get rid of as much accumulated everything as possible, so that I can get on with my life, with all those events that have been left in the "to do" pile, and move them to the "done, what's next?"

For that, you'll have to keep on reading...

1 comment:

  1. i mentioned this to you before, but i'll repeat it for public consumption: i feel that the people who have revelations from this sort of experience and change their lives as a result were likely very unhappy with their lives before the incident. so if you don't feel the burning need to make all these changes, congratulations. it means you were being true to yourself beforehand.