A few weeks ago, I had determined that I would be leaving this apartment, and neighborhood, for a much nicer, quieter, less commercial, and overall, better area. Leaving this place would imply a higher rent, but that would pretty much be the case wherever we went, especially given the cost to space ratio. This place now is still livable, its the neighborhood that's basically a pit in the process of gentrification.
For those who dont know how that process feels like, or aren't familiar with the area, let me give you a brief description: this is an area that was for a long time one of the armpits of the city, a cheap hood where blue collar families and welfare dynasties mixed up with crack whores and street punks; so basically, fairly lively and colorful, if you dont mind tar as a color scheme. With the real estate boom, some years back, this became a sought after area for developers, as the land cost was still pretty low, so condos have been popping up with a discomforting regularity. As the condos build up, the new tenants moved in: students, young professionals, young families and gays who ended up being excluded from the close-by gay area due to costs and lack of space. these fine folks mix in with the remaining locals, tho many are being pushed out, due to rent increase and just general property value, tho some left because they were "no longer welcome" in the area, like the skinheads. So gentrification has its good points. But also its bad, with awful buildings, pseudo city parks set up to try and discourage the low-rent locals from gathering there, and pretentious and chichi boutiques setting up shop to cater to the new kids.
But that is not the point. We put some math down and looked at the numbers, and it'd be conceivable that we move out on our current means, if a bit tightly. Given last year's events, being tight for a more extended period of time might not be the best game plan. So I came up with a solution: take a small loan. I've done it before, might even do it again, and it'd have taken care of the unknowns and our needs for the coming months.
But I was refused. And will continue to be refused unless I clear up my credit for a good six months solid. Which means that I'm renewing the lease, if only to find a way out of it later.
So what's this thing about timing then?
The thing is that, in hindsight, and hindsight being so great and all, that I had the potential to have dealt with this a few months back, when I got my insurance payments. Had I planned then, this matter would have been resolved at the source and I'd be packing boxes already. But then, I wasn't thinking of moving, not really. The thought wasn't in the headlines, so to speak, so that planning didn't happen.
But I'm not bitching about the past, its just not my style; its like focusing on problems instead of solutions. So instead of saying "if I knew then...", I'm looking at the opportunities that present themselves: we can start strengthening our finances; do the furniture upgrades that were going to take place in the move anyways; finish the clutter purge at a more leisurely pace; and feel less pressure to finding a new place, and settling on whatever is available now, and find something that is much more according to our needs and can fit our upgraded lifestyle, which we are still defining.
Getting old is when any sort of difficulty becomes a problem; youth is when those difficulties are tuned into challenges, and those challenges become a creative impetus. Yes, its possible to turn back time, if you put your mind to it.